I had to jot down a few thoughts this morning as I look out my window to the beautiful day that is brewing in the Pacific North West.

This is God's Country.

Certainly God has blessed all of the United States with some incredible sights and views, but there is just *something* about the scenery here that makes you take a big deep breath and smile, especially on a beautiful day like today. Certainly it rains a lot, but it is never a downpour like what I am accustomed to in the South. It's just a light misty rain. It's almost like a secret weapon that is used to fool us into thinking that rain is miserable and gloomy. Little do we realize that the rain is feeding all the trees and grass, and shaping the landscapes with streams and giving the forest floor the nutrients to show its true colors.

I do not think I could go back to the South and be totally content. This place is amazing. There is more to do within 30 sqaure miles of the City than there is to do in the entire Southeast. There are beaches, mountains, hiking, bicycling, walking, fishing, boating...festivals of some kind every weekend. Culture is in abundance here and the arts is overflowing with versatility.

How do you explain such things?

To top it off, I have the most wonderful family, and I have a great job and I have good friends.

What more could anyone ask for?

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Two days ago, Andrew brought a caterpillar in from a bush outside his window. He placed the fuzzy creature in a habitat made of gladware, a little dirt, a few leaves and some sticks. He carried around the caterpillar many times and even dropped it 3 or 4 times. Somehow the furry critter survived. I attempted to coax him into setting the caterpillar free but he wouldn't dare. So, I relented and told him he could keep it.

Yesterday morning he woke up and visited the creature. He played with it a majority of the day and even took it walking. When we returned, he placed the caterpillar back into his captive environment to sleep for the night.

This morning, the same scenario happened except I got up to check on the caterpillar and thought it was dead. However, upon closer examination I noticed that it was weaving a cocoon.

Hmph, I thought to myself. We're going to get to watch a metamorphosis. Interesting.

As the morning progressed, I thought it would be nice to spend the day with someone familiar. Ashley came to mind. She wanted to visit with us too and I was so glad!!! I was able to share with her some of my fears and self-doubt and she willingly lent her ear.  After a wonderful day with a beautiful soul, we went to her house to do a small devotion. By the way, keep in mind she had no clue that we were babysitting a caterpillar in our home.

She shared with me about the metamorphosis of a caterpillar (of all things) and how everything happens in God's time. Just as a cocoon doesn't need to be opened too early, neither do we need to rush God. She told me that sometimes we need to look to other people to see what they see in our lives. Many times others have insight into our lives and can reveal to us things we ourselves may not see. She reminded me that in due time, God's plan for my life would be revealed and to not get ahead of it. God's brought me this far and He is not going to let me go. In fact, I am holding on to Him stronger than ever before.

I also learned from her that she is quite the entrepeneur on metamorphis of caterpillars! She had a caterpillar farm and learned that whenever a caterpillar is put into captivity, it weaves itself into a cocoon pretty fast. Every once in awhile you will get a butterfly, but more often than not, it crawls into his protective shell and dies never emerging into the beautiful thing it was ultimately meant to be.

The lesson learned is that we have two choices.

1. We can crawl into a cocoon and protect ourselves from life and remain comfortable and warm and in a protective environment. There's only a 50/50 chance that you'll escape what you're running from. or

2. You can stand up and face your demons and plunge forward knowing that all things will happen in God's timing. You can not crack open the cocoon of a butterfly or else it will surely die. Likewise, we can not rush God either. We will never meet our full potential and could end up in a spiritual death.

I wonder how our little pet caterpillar will do? I noticed he made some progress on his cocoon and has almost halfway hid himself into his protective weave. I wonder what the end result will be? He's rushing things because he feels threatened in his Gladware environment. Maybe he'll come out a beautiful butterfly? Maybe not. Hopefully he won't crawl into his weaved hole and die.

Would it behoove my blog if I shared with you that our home group bible study was basically on the same topic? What are we afraid of? What prohibits us from being all that we can be? What holds us back? Are we scared of risk? Will we step out of our comfort zone and follow God's will for our lives?

Sometimes, you just have to wait and see. Perhaps our little caterpillar will make it. I would like to see him crack open into a new world====seen with different eyes and experience it in a different way. Oh...to be a caterpillar and go from a crawling creature to beautiful velvety critter with wings. But how pitiful it will be to watch him crawl into his protective shell and perish.

Oh ..... what would it be like to fly!!

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Fuel prices. Everyone's complaining. Everyone's affected. According to the Energy Information Administration, the average price of fuel this week is $4.71 with prices over $5.00 per 9/10th of a gallon on the West Coast. We still enjoy some of the cheapest fuel in the world (except for the state owned fuel countries

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When you die, what will people say about you? Think about that for a minute before you read the rest of this blog.....Okay, long enough :)

Have you ever thought about that before now? What is the first thing that will come out of their minds? More than that...what is the first thing that will be spoken? More often than not, what people think....and what people say....will be two different things.

Yesterday was a day of deep thought for me and I found myself thinking about this very subject. Whenever I go to the woods, it is usually to escape away with my thoughts and rationalize my emotions. After 5 miles of rough terrain, I left there both mentally and physically exhausted. I literally could not move without something in my body aching. The mugginess lingered in the treetops from the recent downpour and the environment reminded me of how a rain forest might feel. There was no escaping the mugginess regardless of where you walked.

As I plunged through the mud, I was thinking that my emotions have felt somewhat the same. I bring a lot of extra resistance to my life that is unnecessary. I have noticed some behaviors in my life that haven't changed. I ***thought*** they had, but when it came crunch time, I was still going through the same thought processes and behaviors that I have always done.

Our personalities will never change. We are who we are for the rest of our lives. Our past. We all have one. We can not change it. Recognizing old negative behaviors and having the willingness to change them is what makes for a prosperous future. Admitting your faults and moving beyond them leads to positive outcomes.

A guaranteed way of failing at everything in life is to denounce your short comings and misplace the blame on others. This action will generate more negative outcomes than positive and leave a person drained and exhausted with little to give to anyone else. It breeds bitterness, resentment and hate, all easily recognizable traits that others observe openly.

Nothing good can come out of holding on to the past. It will control and continue to shape who we are and how others view us.

I have held on to some behaviors for a long time. I want to let them go, but am not sure how. It has been easier holding on to the past and displacing the blame. Ultimately though, the responsibility is on me to make the choices....and break the old habits.

I want people to say that Dawn brought love and life to those around her. I do not want to be remembered for the bad behaviors I brought to the lives of those I love and once loved. I want to be known for my bubbly personality and ability to bring something positive to another person's life. I want to be known as a positive role model for my child, a good wife to the person I love, a dedicated employee to my employer and a sibling who gives to her family, instead of takes. I wish to be emotionally healthy enough to be there for my cousins and my nieces and nephews and have them know that they can trust me. I want to be known for my consistencies instead of inconsistencies. I want to be known by God as a child of His and I want Him to call me into His presence and say, "welcome home" child. More than anything, I want to be obedient to the will of God.

As for me, I want to be known for what I am.....instead of what I was not...or what I should have been.

Life is too short to waste away on bitterness, anger, and resentment. Our words and actions can hurt in one minute, but it may take a lifetime to undo them.

What are you going to be remembered for the most?

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Well, today I experienced Alabama's first red tape. Never in my entire life have I endured such a circus as I did today in dealing with their government. This place is run by uncoothed rednecks who seem to lack the skill to do anything other than mullet tossing.

Mobile is *supposed* to have an explosion in population within the next two years with a projection of 1.2 million in poulation by 2010. God forbid it is filled with rednecks from Mississippi or the surrounding area in search of the jobs (also known as gold) that will be exploding here in the net year or so. The help wanted ads must be modified to say, "average cooth required".

Please. If you're going to move to Mobile, PLEASE at least have a high school education and enough cooth to figure out the difference between a "road" and a "drive". Honestly....it really doesn't matter.

There are plenty of dumbasses here to go around.

Oh yeah. If someone is wearing contacts....it still qualifies as corrective lenses. Okay?

I had no idea how clever and put together the Georgia DMV was. It took me moving all the way to Alabama and attempt to change a CDL to fully be thankful for the organization that is Georgia DMV. Obtaining this license in Alabama has basically taken me three weeks. I had to provide information that really was not any of their business. I did as asked and it still was not enough. After being sent away ONCE AGAIN, I spent the rest of my morning running around trying to get the other information they were requiring. By 2:30, I still did not have an Alabama Driver's License but I did manage to walk away with a 30 day Alabama ID Card. I still have my Georgia Driver's License.

I hope that the local government that is the DMV is not indicative of how the government runs the state. If it is ---- I pity Mobile County.

Thumbs down.....FAIL....to the rednecks who work at the DMV!!!!

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Have you ever wondered what the purpose of a jelly fish might be? What could they possibly offer this planet except fear? They just sort of slink around the water dragging their tennacles behind them serving no real purpose that I can see. Some of them have little electrical currents running through them and look a lot like the strobe lights over the local ice cream store advertising the day's special.

I had the opportunity to learn jelly fish 101 at Dauphin Island last weekend. In case you don't know what - or where - Dauphin Island is, I will tell you :) It is the little island that almost wasn't after Hurricane Katrina decided to change the landscape a few years ago. It is a pretty sleepy little zip code with nothing there except a Citgo, a BBQ house, and a few homes on stilts...oh yeah, and one Sea Lab.

Curiosity killed me and I had to find out what in the heck a Sea Lab does.  I found out it's a college. Plain and simple. People pay money to study at the sea lab. Perhaps they obtaina degree in Marine Biology or something of the sort? I like Marine Biology. I wanted to be a freshwater biologist at one point in my life. So what the heck? We'll check it out and see what is there for the public.So, me and one curious seven year old decided to skip a few hours at the beach and visit the Sea Lab instead. Unbeknownst to us, it  was open house...so we really got to  see a Sea Lab work :)

After going through the small aquariums and the gift shop (of course), we went to one the classrooms where we got to learn about jelly-fishin' 101. At the door, we got to sample the delicacy of eating a jelly fish. Um. Okay. So I tasted it. Tennacles and all. It did NOT taste like chicken! The stringy mess went through my teeth like spaghetti noodles. I was not impressed.

Then my curious seven year old found the microscope; it was all over but the cryin' then. The little scientist-to-be took such an interest in jelly fish that the students who were there to educate the public took time out to explain all the things he'd see under a microscope. He loved the attention and couldn' get enough.

He saw plankton of all types, baby jelly fish, and even jelly fish eggs. While he was studying jelly fish, I sat with my hands on my hips trying to figure out what these students were learning and why. I was so stunned that students would study sea lab stuff that I had to ask what type of degrees they obtained from there. One young lady who was young enough to be my daughter was obtaining her Ph.D.

Of course I had to ask. "In what?" The young girl kind of laughed and giggled as she shifted her weight on one leg and also placed her hand on her hips to match my expression. She didn't want to tell me that he degree was in the Paleontology of Coral and Marine Biology...so she told me was obtaining her Ph.D. in jelly fish'n and saving coral.

I'm not kidding. Really. When asked what they do with such a degree, the young tree (errr coral) hugger told me that they "save the coral" and that the lab I was actually in was the jelly fish lab.

Jelly fish lab?? Is that anything like a math lab, or even a chemistry lab? Where are the explosive tubes of chemicals and partially dissected frogs? Heck, there weren't even any dissected jelly fish except what was being served up on a plate. Just microscopes and big nets and a few tanks of fish.

Microscopes. Lots of them and a lot of students hanging around talking about jelly fish awareness. I think I bit a whole in my cheek trying to get from laughing out loud! However, I must have been the most impressed because my son and I stayed in there for over a half hour! I think they thought I really had an interest.

I did have an interest - but I was laughing AT them instead of WITH them. The young doctors-to-be were too young and naive to realize that.

I talked with one student while my curious son went from microscope to microscope to try and learn a little more about the degree program. I learned very little about jelly fish, but I did get to listen about saving the coral. I tried to find out how much it costs to go to the Sea Lab and study and even how much someone makes when they obtain a Ph.D. in jelly fish studies, but I never got it out of her simply because I am sure she has no clue because obviously she has more money than sense.

I thought it was interesting that she was munching on some minced jelly fish as I quizzed her on her favorite topic.

Either way, I learned nothing more about jelly fish than when I went in, but I did discover that unless you plan on teaching jelly fishin' 101, that there is very little you can do with a degree in it. I secretly wondered how many were there to learn about jelly fishin' so that they could write more SpongeBob Squarepants segments since that's his favorite thing to do. I think that's where my giggles were coming from.

Actually, all I ever needed to learn about jelly fish, I learned from the little yellow square sponge guy anyway. The students at the jellyfish (err...Sea) Lab could not enlighten me on much of anything about how the jellyfish make our earth a better place to live. But they sure did want to save them and the coral for some reason. Saving coral??? Yes. Understandable. Saving the jellyfish??

I don't get it.

But you know? Maybe we do need to save the jelly fish. Many countries really like the delicacy---our little save-the-jellyfish student was able to miss her twelve o'clock meal. All because she saves the jellyfish :)

It was fun, but not in an educational kind of way. I wished someone would have shared with me what purpose those little creatures bring to the environment because aside from scaring swimmers half to death....I think they're more nuisance than a flea on a dog.

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I have an idea....steal it if you'd like.

I got my oil changed today. I had so much to do, one of which included getting my hair cut and nails done. As I was sitting there watching the other women twiddle their thumbs in the waiting area (it was all women by the way), I thought to myself. DANG. If there was a hair salon or nail salon in here, then we could kill two birds with one stone.

An all-in-one oil lube/car wash/nail salon.

Anyone want to front me the money? I can't do nails but I know I can change the oil in a car!!!

You watch. It will be the next million dollar idea and I will have missed out on it.

GG

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Okay. Here's a question to ponder. I'm as guilty as anyone so I have had to ask myself this same question.

Okay. We love Starbucks. What is at Starbucks that is NOT to like? Seriously, even if you do not like coffee, there is something for you there. We sip coffee, latte's, cold drinks, eat gourmet made muffins and pastries, read their magazines and pay a premium price for all of it.

Without even mentioning the caloric content of most of those drinks, we still buy this stuff in such abundance that we can keep a retail store open in a small Middle Georgia Town!!!!

Ever thought of the caloric content of one of their vanilla caramel latte's? Six hundred calories....easy. Even that doesn't slow us down. To top it off, we do not even get to keep the cup because it is cardboard!!!

Honestly, in the long scheme of things we deal with in our life, what purpose does gourmet coffee serve in making our lives more productive? Honestly. It's a guilty pleasure, but most of us enjoy it everyday.

However, here most of us are complaining about gas prices at $4/gallon but we'll spend $4.00 on a latte. Yeah yeah...I hate the gas prices too and want to flip off the gas pumps everytime I pull up to one!!!!

However, we (as a nation) threatened to NOT buy gas for a day in hopes that one day of not buying gas will help. (are you kidding? America's gonna do what they're going to do when they want to do it....we're a spoiled nation). Maybe save your $4.00/cup lattee for the day, and put a gallon of gas in your tank? At least it contributes to something productive.

Granted, we don't drink a gallon of coffee at a time and go through 15+ gallons of coffee a week. But ounce for ounce (if I was a mathematician, I'd do the math), I think that Starbucks is FAR more expensive than gas, but yet the price of coffee doesn't slow us down from breaking a $5 bill on the stuff. In addition, we don't even complain about the price...afterall, we deserve the pleasure :)  In fact, we look forward to next month's flavors....and the cardboard cup.

I don't know just stupid stuff I think about.

Just so you know, I hate the gas prices too, but I sure do love the guilty pleasure of  a Light Pralines and Cream latte...but I budget my calories. It's only 90 calories a piece . Gotta sacrifice somewhere even if it isn't sacrificing the pocketbook. Besides, driving my car takes my latte money these days.

By the way, Saturday morning lines at the Starbucks drive-thru is usually long. You think we would at least save gas and get out of car and go in.

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Hiking is a new hobby of mine. Not just any hiking, but wilderness hiking has become a new challenge. I knew one day my sense of adventure  would catch up with me because it is just not good to get off the beaten path sometimes. However, those who know me best say that I have always been good at finding my own way; there's some truth to that for sure.

About three weeks ago, I took off with a friend who has a more adventurous spirit than I do. She enjoys going through the bramble and vines and mud. She follows what is called, "the pig trails", which are basically the very small narrow paths that the wild boar use to get arond the woods. Of course they are shorter than humans (ahem), and they are able to avoid the bramble that is higher up (ah, let's say, about human eye level!).

After stepping through some chopped down grass, I stepped down onto something and heard this cute little shreak. Apparantly I had stepped on a little mouse hiding in the tall grasses. Of course that did not scare me but I did feel bad for messing up its home. Hopefully the little quy wasn't squished...I am still not a small girl although there is a lot less of me these days!

We proceeded on to get into the woods and encountered a pretty deep area of swamp that we could not get through. On either side of the swamp were huge mounds of sticks and vines or on the other side was just vines.

Pick the easiest of the two!

I choose the sticks. Of course that idea failed when I attempted to crawl on top on of the pile of sticks and quickly fell through, burying my entire left leg in the mess. After I managed to get out of that catastrophy I looked down and noticed my pants leg had blood on it. I pulled up my pants leg and low and behold one of the sticks had jabbed my calf; it hurt bad!

I really wanted to give up, but she was determined to get around the swamp so we back tracked and went a different direction. This landed us in the center of the swamp!

We found a couple of pig trails and followed them along for about a mile. I dodged sticks, jumped over LARGE trees (more like crawled) and avoided hanging vines. Remembering I am on a "pig" trail, I was constantly on the look out for the wild tusked animal to charge me because "I" was in "his" territory.

My friend pressed further and really and truly all I wanted to do was turn back. I was NOT having fun. However, she pressed on and so did I, and she promised me that just on the other side of those woods (pointing way ahead of me) it gets better and is worth the walk.

I pressed on; I also continued to pick stickers out of my face and arms from the briars!

After crawling over two more extra large fallen trees and crawling under another one, and walking through thick, black mud, we finally reached the "other" side.

It was awesome. An entire canopy of trees, untouched by man, encompassed the area. A small stream that flowed into the river trickled through the middle and the entire floor of the "forest" was leaf covered with different arrays of browns. The swamp was behind us and this area of woods was entirely untoched by anyone.

It was just incredible to view and made walking a heck of a lot of easier from there on out.

As I was there, I was thinking and paralleling that trail walk with my life. It has taken a lot of briars and scrapes and wallering in the mud get to the oasis I am at now. It has been nearly two decades of fighting the elements of "life" to get to a point to where I could actually enjoy the things and the people around me. However, I have realized that not only I, but all people, go through trials in life....the rough, bramble encompassed trail of life.... and there are many rough spots a long the way. Pressing on seems difficult and really what would be easier would be to just turn around. But sometimes pressing on brings peace...and happiness...and contentment in unknown ways; it makes you appreciate the calm in a good way.

I learned a life lesson that day.

That sort of hiking is not something I would like to do everyday. I now have learned to take the well beaten path of bicycle trails and walking trails, but in all honesty, I really liked the wilderness hiking. I do not want a steady "diet" of it, but it is fun....the challenge is welcoming; so is the happy life I live.

It's been a long time coming and the scrapes and bruises I have received have been numerous. I'm enjoying my peace and tranquility :)

GG

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